As I sat and watched the sunrise top over the trees it once again, reminded me of Fire. Viewing the orange and red sky out my 3 by 5 glass window is none the less magical than Glenda the Good Witch. The glistening and glowing embers behind the treeline stopped all morning conversations and thoughts right in their tracks.
“Get up, Get up” shouted my muses! But I am tired I need some time to stop thinking!! Holly has had quite a lot going on but does all of the rest of the world. God has been showing me through so many amazing little syncronicities from my past lately and I now know that every morning I will wake with an anticipation of a new event or excitement for the day at hand. I used to think, today is going to be the day that the shoe will drop and I always started my day with a little fear mixed with my Kcup. The unsettling rational used to say I was never going to be good enough at anything and now I know that I can wake up and be the very best person I can be today and live judgement free and free of guilt. I realized just yesterday that the fears of abandonment I carried my whole life were now gone. I am blessed.
Do you know who else lived in fear with his Poetry and his Muses? Poe. That is right. Edgar Allan Poe. I was recently introduced to him again. In the 11th grade, I think in school, my English teacher, Mrs. Roberts, had been the one to turn me on to the Raven. She is the one teacher that stands out to me more than any others. She taught English Lit. Loved her!! She taught at Iroquois in 1989. (If anyone knows her please send her to me.) Any hop…… reading those amazing old era1800 stories gave us a picture of what life was like before. Before, Kcups and iPads and Apple. Before General Mills cereal and social media. Can you imagine for one moment that you are closely related to someone that walked this earth with those fashionable dresses and a miriad of Buttons and Lace? I would love to see a box of old buttons. I would love to run my hands through them and see which button would jump out at me. Would that belong to a lady that had 4 children and was Widowed? Would it have belong to a little servant girl with ribbons and bows in her hair. They still existed back then you know. Servents, Butlers, Porters (my maiden) and the likes thereof. And Books…1800’s books are disappearing by the dozens. Grab them up and find yourself a nice personal library of things that mean something to you. For me, I choose books on history and metaphysics. I think they are both just way cool!
As I finish my morning thoughts, among 4 dogs in my bed and a bearded King sipping his Kcup, I am reminded of Edgar, his thoughts and fears and how HE always thought that the Wolf was at the Door. (stated his wife Virginia). I refuse to live that way anymore. I refuse to live in fear that I do not have control of my own destiny in this drive through life. My pains, frustrations and financial problems are NOTHING when you are facing greater terms. There are universal terms which cause us to face reality and sometimes reality bites. But, you can journey your way through this lifetime spiritually unscathed if you choose it. Reading about our history and past is a good way to hear what the old folk had to say about survival. George Washington even had to admit at one point, brining all those Englishmen over to start a new lad had to have been fearful. Did he wake up every morning waiting for the shoe to drop. On the days that he did, I am sure he had men and women around him of good courage to remind him of the greater destiny. Well, American babies, here we are. have you had a chance to look at the glass to see if it is half full or empty. We all have struggles. I have put a goal out there to not drink until summer. Yesterday, I put a 6 pack of beer in my grocery card and wheeled it up and down 5 aisle telling myself the following……no one has to know…….there is no judgement……..stop depriving yourself……..if you do, it is ok as long as you get back on your greater purpose…..blah…..blah…..blah. I took the beer out and left it on aisle 7 if you want to call the stock police. I do not know if I will be as strong today, or tomorrow but yesterday, I made a beneficial choice. Pray for me. I am not a raging drunk but I love the taste. My tastebuds find rich dark beer as a decadence. I treat. It is just the drunkeness that gets carried away. Too much of a good thing is causing my liver to screech and my head to have oceanic swirls each morning. And my pocket book to be drained. Drinking is expensive. Have you checked out the price of a six pack lately. I could get two gallons of petro yah?
Well, I hope you have enjoyed my thoughts and meeting with myself today. The sun is well past the horizon now and I have a lot to do today. Why? Because, this IS who I am and we all have things to do……. I am so thrilled to realize no matter what events take place in life, today is ALL that truly matters. Tomorrow is either going to be here in the physical or gone into the layers of Spirit that we all search for. I want to seek out the most important things in life. For me, they are Reading, Writing, Reiki, my Family and my Truest of Friends. And my Enemies. (I don’t think I have any but I do have haters out there somewhere. Some of them, rightfully so! I have done some stupid shit.) Please pray for my family today. We have a need. And tomorrow, Ms. Lola has her surgery. My momma is the strongest inspiration I have. She is the fortress of which I want to become. I LOVE my momma! She may not even realize how much but that is not because I don’t tell her. It is because our busy lives pull us away from even the most valuable of relationships. Pray for my family as I pray for yours. We are all highly emotional beings and until we get our emotions in order, we cannot see past our fears. I hope my writing helps you with that too. (You can do it!!!)
Until I see you!
Eleanor Elaine Phoenix
Kentucky Story Crafter